Je Ne Sais Quoi: Leaving the 9-5

It seems like forever since I've posted about je ne sais quoi! So without further adieu, here's a little story about leaving the 9-5 from yours truly...

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away (or about 2 miles) there was a girl who worked in a cubicle. She arrived at her cube promptly at 8 every morning, and left around 5 to return home. Her daily tasks involved spreadsheets and databases and sales quotas. And her dreams at night were filled with Outlook tasks and appointments and phone calls.

The girl originally journeyed to the land of the cubicles hoping to build a future--a career and new skills and respectable accolades. But what she found instead was that she did not fit in. The cubes were too confining, the tasks too structured and formal. She longed instead for color and creativity and passion. But to pursue those things meant leaving the land of the cubicles, and she wasn’t sure if that was such a good idea.

Because there were some good things about this far, far away (ok, 2 miles) land, like a steady paycheck and security and upward mobility. Beyond the borders of her cubby were less comforting possibilities, like failure and financial decline and isolation. And so she stayed. Days turned to months. Months turned to years (okay...maybe 1.5 years). And she wilted. And withered. And eventually dried up.

But not completely.

Finally, mustering her small measure of courage, she decided to leave the land of the cubicles and try to move somewhere else. The journey was very bumpy. She was lonely and often afraid. She lost her income, her status, her connections. She spent many hours fretting and feeling low after working with little to show for her efforts. But she kept moving ahead anyway. Days turned into months. Months turned to years (2). And slowly--ever so slowly--she started to set buds again.

Little by little her vision got bigger, and her creativity grew. She got better at what she was doing, and the work revived her spirit. She spent less time fretting, and more time living. She discovered skills she didn’t even know she had. She made new friends. And people started to notice her presence once again.

Because finally she was blooming.

Every once in awhile, the girl finds herself driving past the far, far away land (2 miles from her house) of cubicles and spreadsheets and considers how far she’s come. It certainly wasn’t easy. But coming into yourself never is.

Read more about my "lifestyle makeover" by clicking here!
Also, to read this week's email, "Spring is Budding with Possibility," click here!

Being & Doing: reflections on a Monday morning

After almost two years of blogging, Monday mornings still give me pause. I wake up like most people thinking of the work week ahead--the projects I need to do, the appointments I have, the leftover tasks I didn’t finish from the previous week. And during this quick mental survey of the days ahead, I can’t help but think about the Monday mornings of my past--the ones when I woke up and dreaded the week ahead. On those days I didn’t want to get out of bed. My to-do list held no interest for me. My appointments were void of purpose. My leftover tasks felt like heavy weights on my shoulders.



Those were difficult Mondays.

Fortunately my weekly kick-offs have since improved. And the improvement began with a simple question: who do I want to be? Part of the answer--as you might guess--was that I wanted to be someone who enjoyed Monday mornings.



I find it interesting that we ask children “what do you want to be when you grow up?” and expect them to answer with what they want to do. Because being and doing are not the same thing. Two years ago, for instance, I was doing the expected full-time career, but I wasn’t being who I wanted to be.



I bring this all up because a) it is Monday, and b) originality begins with “who do you want to be?” My answer to the question--a creative entrepreneur/mom/wife/leader--was what led me to overhaul my cookie-cutter life in pursuit of something different. It is what led me here, to all of you.

Originality, then, is not something to do. Yes, there are plenty of original things we can do--many of them I write about here. But fundamentally I want to Be an Original. And that is what we’re going to gab about for the rest of this week. So stick around to hear more...and I hope you enjoy your Monday.

To read more about my "lifestyle makeover," click here.

Day 10: the Balancing Act (as told through vintage advertisements)

It is day ten at the Institute, and Mrs. Marple decided that it was time to address something that often challenges us in the pursuit of fine living: time management.

She commented about how busy we all are today, and how it is difficult to keep a balance between diligence (a necessarily quality for fine living) and burn-out.


The pressures on our time are numbered. First there's the expectation that we will put in a full day of work, because "what you do" often equates to "who you are" (a fact that clearly bugs Mrs. Marple).

But work is only the start. Then you're supposed to keep a clean and tidy house. Wearing heels. The heels are important. As is the apron.

And like it. Oh...you better like it.

And of course cooking is crucial (as is keeping the kids away from narcotics, which apparently this well-manicured mother has overlooked).

You are expected to make sure that kids have a well balanced meal. Although these parents might be more concerned that their son is clearly a serial killer waiting to happen. He's horrifying.

Multi-tasking is an obvious must. Like organizing your food in colorful tupperware while also catching up on the latest news.

And of course there are the garden-variety pressures of maintaining appearances so that you can enjoy a night out on the town with your friends (who are also clearly using some kind of narcotic...what was in the punch, I wonder?).


And with our rising health costs, it is important that you make time daily for fitness.

Do it for your country. Do it for yourself.

And yes--apparently these sexy sauna pants were a real product. They claim to slenderize exactly where you want in an amazing one-size-fits-all easily inflatable model.

Finally, after all of the above is accomplished, you also have to pursue those intimate times. Thankfully there are fashionable temptations like the above swim shorts to aid you.

As does this his-and-hers cowboy attire. Nothing is sexier. Except maybe that hairstyle.

And if you're really struggling, you can opt for these matching white jumpers. Because let's be honest--we all could use some help from time to time.

Mrs. Marple warned us that capitulating to all of these pressures on our time, appearance and mind can drain our creativity, which is the keystone of fine living. And though there are no easy tricks to keeping the right balance, practice can help.

As can white jumpers.

See you in class tomorrow!

Previous Days at the Institute:
Day 9: Pink, Pink & Pink
Day 8: Ditching Class
Day 5: Getting Ahead

Smarty Pants: Jobs vs. Livelihoods

note: smarty pants posts are my reflections on current events, trends, and perspectives.

I wrote this morning that as a society we tend to gravitate toward utilitarianism when we are stressed out about money. So I thought that this afternoon I would give you an example of what I mean by this...

I was reading last week's issue of Time magazine where they featured a series of short articles on "world changing" ideas happening right now. The very first idea that they listed was titled "Jobs are the New Assets," and I was curious. On the surface this article seemed to make a lot of sense. The basic thesis was that right now our jobs are the most important thing we have going for us. Since our investments are in the toilet, and our homes are losing value, our jobs have become the one nugget of security we can, and should, hold on to.

A Burr in My Saddle:

Underneath the top layer, though, something about this thesis bothered me. I mulled it around for awhile, and came to the conclusion that it was precisely this "utilitarianism" I've been writing about that bugged me. Let me explain.

One of the key points of the article was that our human capital translates into our economic output. In other words, our skills and knowledge can be "invested" into our jobs and earn "interest" in increased economic output. Now that's all fine and well, but I'm not sure I like being defined into categories like "capital" and "output." And therein lies the burr under my saddle: in a recession, particularly when our incomes are threatened, it is easy to start thinking of ourselves as little more than worker bees. The "bottom line" become a primary measure of value. Now this may be a practical (aka utilitarian) and helpful way of looking at things if you are an accountant, economist or banker, but it does not figure as well for stay-at-home moms, artists, writers, and caregivers.

An Unfortunate Temptation:

What I am finding is that during this "economic crisis," the temptation is to look at everything through the lens of "output" and "interest." Unfortunately, day-to-day life is not so easy to quantify. What "output," for instance, do we assign to raising children? What "interest" is earned from creating something beautiful? And do we really want to start measuring everything from that perspective anyway? I certainly don't!

To be fair, the article ended on a higher note, touching on the virtues of finding meaningful work that reflects who we are as individuals. Which leads me to my final thought: "jobs" are truly an important "asset," but I much prefer the term "livelihood" because it implies a better measurement for value: life. I want the work I do to impart life, not just "output." And I want to resist the temptation to start viewing the value of my work under and artificial register of "assets" and "liabilities."

What are your thoughts?

I'm curious to know what your thoughts are about this "recession perspective" of seeing everything in terms of capital and output. Do you find it helpful, or stressful? How do you view the work you do daily, especially during this time? Please share by commenting below!

Previous Smarty Pants posts:

In a Time of Economic Proposals, Here's Mine

Econ 101

The Middle East: steps to forming an opinion

Marketplace Mavens: Whitney from Lucky Me Beads

note: Marketplace Mavens are women who inspire me with their entrepreneurial lifestyle.  I write about them every Monday, and hope you are inspired by them too!

Earlier this fall I had the privilege of sitting down at a local coffee to talk business and life with Whitney, a local artist and entrepreneur who (you guessed it) sells on Etsy.  I quickly learned that one of the incredible things about Whitney is that she has not one, not two, but Four stores on Etsy!  And each one offers a unique product, and showcases a unique skill.

For instance, Pine and Hanker is Whitney's "sewing" store, a skill she admitted to me is one of her most recent favorites.  Lucky Me Beads is where you can find some very cool pendants and can order custom silhouettes.  At Junk Envy, you can peruse an online collection of neat flea market finds (like rolls of carnival tickets and yellow Converse sneakers!).  And finally, Whitney Leigh is the stop for mixed media art pieces.  Talk about a jack of all trades!

Even more amazing than juggling four stores is that Whitney is doing it with her adorable infant son right alongside her.  

Here is what I learned from Whitney:

*  entrepreneurialism is a way of life.  Whitney shared that her family has always been entrepreneurial, and that she never saw herself working in the conventional 9-5.  Clearly she learned a different way to live, and makes working for yourself look easy (although I'm sure it is not always that way).

*  creative enterprise can work with family.  Whitney admitted that she isn't able to devote as much time to her business now that she is a mom, but she also shared that having a business and a baby has been a good fit for her.  She gets to work from home, spend time with her son, and still earn income from her artistic skills.

* getting out and meeting people is mavenhood in action!  Case in point--Whitney introduced herself to me because she is organizing a craft show in our local area, and hopes to get likeminded people together for it.  And she clearly has a knack for making friends, since her work is sold in local coffee shops around town, too!  (Her warm friendliness is probably part of it!)  Bottom line?  Marketplace Mavens like Whitney surround themselves with others.  It's the best way to do business!

I want to thank Whitney for meeting with me, and for sharing about her life as a Maven!  I invite you to check her out at her many stores (see links above) and her blog (click here).  

Do you know a Marketplace Maven?  Tell me about her!  Email me at shillberry@comcast.net or comment here.  

Want to have weekly Maven inspiration sent directly to your email?  Then subscribe to this blog today.  Click here to learn more! 

Previous Mavens:

Jessica Forbes of Ravelry.com

Hannah Breshears of Red Tandem Studio

Amanda Blake Soule of Soule Mama

Taking a Pay Cut

Happy Monday!  Welcome to week two of Deviancy 101, a short series I'm writing on how my life went off the 9-5 beaten path.  This week I want to talk about the most challenging area of my deviant lifestyle--the money.  Because choosing to deviate from the norm meant that one of the first decisions I had to make was to walk away from a predictable income that was directly deposited into my account every other week.  It was not an easy choice to say the least.  I was fond of the money (and the "retail therapy" at Target it regularly funded), and knew that I would probably be making a lot less during the transition.  I was right.

The truth is that taking a pay cut is a common side effect of choosing to "go off the grid."  Staying home with children, or starting a home-based business (like me), or a combination of both, usually doesn't churn out a stable, corporate-style paycheck every month.  Those choices usually require financial sacrifice.  And that sacrifice--I'm not gonna lie--has certainly been the hardest for me.  Because making money makes me feel good, especially when I'm earning enough to provide for the basics and few extras.  Money validates my work--tells me that other people care about what I do and are willing to shell out the bucks for it.  And it legitimizes my discipline, too, reassuring me that my labor is not in vain.  Making a choice to forego that temporarily (or indefinitely) is tough--or at least it has been for me.

So why do it?  Why take a pay cut when you don't have to?  (questions I ask myself almost every day.)  Well, because I'm passionate about the work that I'm doing now in a way that I never was when I had a steady paycheck and was working for someone else.  And I believe it is valuable, even if the money hasn't caught up to it yet.

I wish (oh how I wish), that to trail off the beaten path was all about earning tons of money doing what you love.  But in reality, it is more about being willing to take a pay cut to do what you love, and hope that the rewards will outweigh the sacrifice.  The reward of being home more with your kids, or creating a small business from your skills and talents, or the enjoyment of being your own boss.  Of course I hope that my willingness to take a pay cut doesn't mean that I'll always earn less, but for now it does.  And for most it will.

Share your "pay cut" stories with me by emailing me at shillberry@comcast.net or commenting here.  And don't forget to stick around later today when we celebrate another Marketplace Maven!