Monday, April 12, 2010

Letter from the Editor: Am I Really Enough?

Good morning (or afternoon for you East Coasters)! I just returned from a visit to the vet (the “boys” needed their annual check-up, and we needed to receive our annual scolding for not brushing their teeth...), and am heading out soon to a women's leadership retreat, but before my day gets away from me I wanted to touch base with you all--

If you’ve been reading Deviantly Domesticated for any length of time,
you’ve probably come to learn that I always have new plans and projects up my sleeve. Therefore it should come as no surprise to you that I have some fun features and opportunities planned for this space for the rest of 2010. And one of them is to start writing a letter from the “editor” (so-to-speak)--direct from me to you--on a more regular basis. Because though you often see my latest fashion projects, culinary efforts and thoughts on femininity, you don’t often hear about my day-to-day life as an writer/speaker/wife/friend/etc.

So I thought I’d kick off this new column today
with some of my reflections on a je ne sais quoi post I wrote last month--the one about being “enough.” You see, I have to confess that I’ve been struggling with that one quite a bit lately. Probably it comes with the territory of being an entrepreneur--it is common to feel like there is always more work that can be done, and not enough time to do it. But even more so, I’ve been challenged lately because I have ambitions that I’m not attaining. For instance, I’d like to make more money. And I’d love to have a larger audience. And I worry that I’m not doing enough--or don’t have what it takes--to reach the goals I’ve set.

In other words, I worry that I’m falling short. That I don’t have the right skills or the right stamina or the right connections. Because I figure that if I was enough, than I would be more successful at reaching those goals...right? My life doesn’t look the way I want, so there must be something wrong with me...right?

I bring this up because I know that on the surface it looks like I have everything together. But the truth is that I think about these ideas of femininity and confidence and beauty as much as you all do--and I don’t have it all figured out. So even though I have the sense to write about “being enough,” the practice of it is not as easy.

Fortunately I have good friends and family to listen to me, give advice, and offer encouragement. And I’m thankful for all of you, too, who read my posts and send me your comments. So know that in addition to a week full of retreats and business expos and daily chose, I’ll also be working on just being enough.

We’ll talk again soon!

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