I’m a big fan of the glossies, as most of you already know. Somedays, when I just want to relax, I’ll head to the local bookstore to drink a hot tea and flip through the tabloids and fashion magazines at my leisure. I’m rather ashamed to admit that I take voyeuristic peeks into the lives of celebrities--and I like it. And I scour the fashion pages even though I know they’re exacerbating my urge to consume in excess. And I read the fitness sections as if they’re somehow going to motivate me to actually leave the bookstore and go for a jog (they never do...). I even like the silly quizzes, though I don’t mark them up in the store (because that’s just rude).
But one thing I’ve recently been noticing about all of these glossies is that they’re always trying to get me to improve myself. Whether it’s the 5 simple steps I can take to eat healthier, or the 10 secrets to making me a dynamo in bed, the underlying message is You Can Do Better.
Now, the truth is that I could do better. And I have to admit that part of me appreciates the encouragement and motivation. But once the gloss wears off, it just starts to feel like A.Lot.Of.Work.
And so I wonder--do the women who possess the elusive je ne sais quoi have some kind of secret self-improvement regimen that the rest of us don’t know about? Or are they maybe just more successful at implementing all of these earnest suggestions and check lists that line the pages of women’s magazines?
Somehow I doubt it--on both accounts. My suspicion is that actually the women with je ne sais quoi have mastered something else entirely--rest. They aren’t striving for perfection, but instead are resting right where they are. And this is why we are attracted to them.
I’m learning that there is a great chasm between a spirit at rest and one that is striving. The latter is driven to always improve, always grow, always advance, while the former says "I could improve, but I’ve done enough for now."
...Yes, I could fold the laundry while talking on the phone...but this conversation is enough.
...And Yes I could wake up twenty minutes earlier and squeeze in a workout, but my weekend walk is enough.
...And Yes I could be better in bed, and better at correspondence, and better at cooking, but Damn It! I Am Enough, just as I am.
Not perfect, not finished, but Enough.
Imagine what that would feel like. No wonder there’s just something about a lady like that.
What do you think? Have we gone too far with the self-improvement, or do you find it genuinely helpful? Share your thoughts below!